Category: Healthy Communication Dynamics

When Someone Asks “How are You” & You Say, “I’m Fine,” Are You Really?

This week is Mental Health Week in Canada. And how timely given the challenging times of this global pandemic. The overarching message for the year is the importance of social connection on mental health. A message that’s difficult to heed when we’re trying to protect ourselves and others by physical distancing.

So the Canadian Mental Health Association’s campaign is for everyone to “#GetReal about how we feel and lean on each other for support, even if it has to be from afar.

So often we’re used to covering how we’re feeling with the words ‘I’m fine.’ When we do that, we’re choosing not to share our truth, and so preventing opportunities for real social connections and missing out on meaningful connections.… Read the rest

Real Connection in Communication – 5 steps

Connection in communicationBeing real in your communication invites connection. That often requires some vulnerability and that’s not something we feel comfortable doing with just anyone. It is important to make connections through communication. In this post we will give you resources for how to make connections and communicate more efficiently.

Human connection is vital to feeling free and alive. Yet, for most people, we’ve been taught a more righteous form of communication that has you needing to prove your point to be right.

Communication is about exchanging views for the benefit of all parts, people that feels heard is willing to hear, and in that exchange you find real connection.… Read the rest

Relationship Reality vs Fairy Tale Fantasy

Relationships …. Blissful or Maddening?

Relationship Reality vs the Fairy Tale Fantasy

“One day your prince will come” and other Fairy tales we were taught growing up.

Maybe you believed them, maybe you still do or maybe you don’t. But it’s what the movies and advertising are continuing to teach. “You are not enough if you’re not beautiful and with someone successful or successful and with someone beautiful.” But don’t worry there’s someone out there who will save you.

Ha! No there isn’t. Sorry I know that’s tough to hear.

Yes I’ve grown jaded of those sentiments. AND at the same time I harbour hopes and romantic dreams.… Read the rest

Happy couple looking out at the water

Relationships: Hard Work or Adventure?

Successful relationships are a Work in Progress

Has your relationship become stale or filled with constant conflict? It’s probably because it’s stopped growing.

Do you even look at your partner anymore? Or if you do is it only when you’re mad? Relationships stop growing when we think we know everything there is to know about ourselves and our partner. If you’re feeling bored, lonely or frustrated in your relationship then it’s an indication that growth and progress has stopped.

Let’s change the word ‘work’ to Adventure and Curiousity.

The truth is, you don’t know everything about yourself, so how could you know everything about your partner.… Read the rest

Couple in conflict, disagreeing, feeling unhappy, arguing.

Reconnect with Your Partner- A Relationship Exercise

THE 15 MINUTE EXERCISE

15 minutes?..Yes that’s all you’ll need to reconnect with your partner again.

And what happens when you feel connected in your relationship? Your anxiety and stress goes down, you sleep better, communicate better and feel happy. What’s there to lose?

This relationship exercise is simple but, like anything that requires open expression, it’s uncomfortable at first. Not to worry, you’ll soon reap the rewards and feel more relaxed. If better communication and connection is what you want with your partner then it will be worth it to practice getting comfortable with that discomfort.

This is a great connection and communication exercise to use on its own as well as between counselling sessions, it speeds up progress.… Read the rest

The One Thing for Dating and Public Speaking

What do dating and public speaking have in common?

One thing.

It’s this One Thing that separates the good speech from the great and a 1st date into a possible 2nd.

I learned this One Thing in dating a long time ago. I was on a first date with a guy and I thought he was so cute and wanted to see him again. But he didn’t. Hm what happened? As I was reflecting back on the date looking at what I did and said I realized. Oohh I was so focused on myself and worried about what he was thinking of me that I couldn’t pay attention to what he was saying and finding out who he was.… Read the rest

Calm Anxiety And Boost Confidence with Body Language

Have you been looking in the wrong places to calm anxiety and boost confidence? You’re not alone.

Our feelings and thoughts are constantly being communicated whether we’re aware of it or not because most of what we’re saying is expressed through our body language not just our words.

Your body speaks, mainly, in these ways.

1) Internally through emotions and feelings.

2)Externally to the world through your body language and postures.

3)Outwardly through spoken words.

Out of those, 80% of what others are receiving is through our body language. That’s a lot!! Only a small portion is words and tone of voice, the rest is appearance, movements, gestures and facial expressions.… Read the rest

Get Rid of Negative People?

We’ve all heard someone say. .I need to get away from negative people. You may have said it yourself and I know I’d said it in my pre-counselling life. ‘In order for me to thrive and be happy I need to stay away from certain people’.

The hidden miracle and truth that’s hiding in plain sight is… It’s more about you than it is about them.

If you’re often taking other people’s views or behaviors personally? this topic is for you. If you’re often disappointed with other’s ability to follow through or be relied on? This topic is for you.… Read the rest

Anger Management and Communication in Relationship with Liz Coleman RTC

Change Your View of Fighting in Relationships

Fighting and conflict in relationships can feel horrible.

So it’s not surprising that most couples feel like it’s a set back to their progress. It’s such a common way of looking at it because, really, it seems to shake the stability and safety we rely on. Even though ‘needs’ seem to be a bad word in our society the truth is we NEED our relationships. (I mean all relationships here but especially intimate ones)

Interdependence

Our confidence and safety in the world depends on the stability of our relationships not in a dependent way but an interdependent way. It’s possible to love and be close to someone without giving parts of yourself away.… Read the rest

Express Emotions Responsibly

What good are our emotions anyway.. do we really need them?

Do you wish you could get rid of your emotions?

It does seem as if life would be easier without emotions sometimes. They make life messy and out of control when often we prefer tidy and controlled.

Of course it’s not that simple…. Getting rid of ‘negative’ emotions means giving up the ‘positive’ aspects as well.. they’re connected. You know how close laughing and crying can be?… it’s a very fine line. One second you’re laughing and the next you’re crying or better yet the other way around. It’s how we’re wired. You can’t have one without the other.

If you’re interested in finding out about the body’s reaction to emotions the late Candace Pert did a lot of research and wrote a book The Molecules of Emotions.… Read the rest

Do Your Inner Thoughts Often Sound Judgemental and Critical?

<p>If you find yourself in self-judgement and shame, such as thinking “I’m not good enough,” you’re not …

When Someone Asks “How are You” & You Say, “I’m Fine,” Are You Really?

<p>This week is <a href="http://www.mentalhealthweek.ca">Mental Health Week in Canada</a>. And how timely given the challenging …

tools to calm anxiety

Two Tools to Calm Anxiety

<p style="margin: 0cm; margin-bottom: .0001pt;"><span style="color: #0e101a;">The following are two simple tools you can …