As Bruce Lee is quoted to say “I don’t fear the man that has practiced 10,000 kicks. I fear the man that has practiced 1 kick 10,000 times.”
Well so it is with your relationships and in your personal life. How do we do anything well? We practice. This seems easy to believe when it’s an instrument or golf swing but what about if we’re wanting more Peace and Happiness? Does it apply? … Yes it does.
Realistically you can say you’ve already been practicing some behaviours everyday. It’s our automatic, learned responses. If happiness isn’t a problem in your life leave well enough alone but if not then you could say you’ve been practicing the ‘wrong’ things. You know those things that you aren’t even aware of, like life’s hidden rules you follow, or reactions that you just automatically do. Essentially, those are practices too.
It’s hard to stay away from the Bruce Lee lines ‘Enter the Dragon’ “Been practicin’ huh?’ Remind yourself of that every time you react in a way that pushes loving people or experiences away. The answer is “ya I’ve been practicing… the wrong things!”
Practice steps:
- Choose one thing or area you can focus all your attention on for the next week. It can be something small but should be significant, like making eye contact with a smile to someone you see each day, or making your bed every morning or giving thanks for something you’re grateful for.
- Put a dedicated effort and focus on this one thing for a week straight.
- If you miss a day, no worries, just begin again.
- Pretty soon it becomes second nature and the practice has become routine.
Let’s say you notice this practice sets you up for the day and you feel more productive, happy or calm. Others will also take notice. It then can become a way of life, a habit that you want to continue. That is when you know you have been successful.
So GO ask yourself …. What’s one thing I can do to make a significant difference in my relationship or personal life? (If this very idea causes you stress or anxiety, click here to read How Stress Can Be Good For You.)
Let me know in the comments or send me a private message HERE on what you’ve chosen and how it goes.
Liz Coleman, RTC, is a Registered Therapeutic Counsellor based in Surrey, BC. She specializes in anxiety, anger, insecurity, and relationship problems. If you have any questions about this article or would like to schedule an appointment, please call Ms. Coleman at (604) 809-8947 or use the convenient form on her Contact page.